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17Sep

Just Say ‘No’.

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I’m usually a ‘Yes’ person. I like to say ‘Yes’ a lot. For example, ‘A large glass of wine, madame?’ ‘Yes’. I’m a glass: fully large sort of person. However, regarding Scottish Independence, I’m a ‘No’. Mainly because I believe that Scotland makes the UK look cool. They are like England’s cooler older sister, rebelling,...

14May

I Do? More Like: ‘OK’ For Now (Magazine)

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Kim Kardashian, Katie Price, Kerry Katona. This Blog is brought to you by the letter ‘K’ and the number ‘3’. For, these women all have married 3 times and have the letter ‘K’ in common. But trust me these women are far from ‘OK’. Unless you mean the magazine, in which case they are in...

19Feb

‘Take your coat off love, or you won’t feel the Benefit.’ Carol at The Job Centre

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Ever since I made my New Years’ Resolution to read less Daily Mail Showbiz and Entertainment News and MORE Independent Culture and Arts News I’ve found that my mind has somewhat expanded in length. Don’t get me wrong I’m still pretty small minded, (at least I’m not big headed), but switching from what my boyfriend...

11Feb

Kiss The Rain

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I’m no Michael Fish, but the recent proclamations from UKIP blaming the heavy rain on the fact that we are now a country that does not prohibit Equal Marriage, has made me contemplate other environmental global issues that might also be a consequence of homosexuality: Is the fact that we have an ever growing hole...

2Dec

The Age Of Kimye: PDA Dismay

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Kim Kardashian has over exposed herself once again. I’m beginning to think she has deep rooted insecurities around wearing clothes. Maybe she had a psychologically damaging experience whilst wearing them-perhaps a childhood trip to Tammy Girl ended particularly badly? She should go on my new show idea, channel 4 spin off- ‘How To Look Good...

13Nov

A Whole Lot of Naked- Naked Vs Innocent (Smooth(ie))

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I’ve noticed a lot of nakedness in the sleb* world of late. I mean, I’ve literally never seen so much ‘Naked’ in all my life. Well, apart from the time I went on that popular brand of smoothie detox diet. And even then I switched half way through to ‘Innocent’.  This was because I did...

2Nov

Pushing The Envelope: Open Letters

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Open Letters are like open relationships. A fun idea in theory but ultimately one person is going to get hurt and the other person is going to look like a dick. With the Royal Mail selling off its shares, the ever escalating price of stamps and the general postage system in disarray its no wonder...

12Sep

To Twerk Or Not To Twerk: Oh My(iley)!

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This week I learnt a new word. And it didn”t occur while watching an episode of Countdown or doing The Guardian Crossword or watching Q.I or…… errr, downloading that app where you learn a new word everyday….. (I don”t do Apps, I am not “Appy”, I DON”T HAVE AN I PHONE, OK???!!!). Ahem……………It happened while...

28Jun

North Is The New Apple

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The Apple doesn”t fall far from the tree in Celeb Land. And by that I mean- young Apple-the 2004 offspring of Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin is a chip off the old block. Well, probably not a chip if you believe what Gwyneth eats. More a macrobiotic sweet potato off the old block. You are...

12Apr

The Right State of Thatcher

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OK, so perhaps I was living under a rock during the 1980″s. By “rock” I mean a combination of Mrs. B”s womb and St. Francis R.C. Primary School-where rather ironically I recall my fondest memories were that of drinking milk. Anyhow, news of Margaret Thatcher”s death this Monday and the consequent proclamations of hatred towards...

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